The Mummy Should be Mummified and Forgotten

“Whatever’s in there has been safely hidden for two thousand years. This isn’t a tomb, it’s a prison.”

Photo+courtesy+of+IMDB

Photo courtesy of IMDB

     The Mummy was released in 2017, and was directed by Alex Kurtzman. The film stars Tom Cruise and Annabelle Wallis. Nick Morton discovers an ancient tomb which holds secrets he never imagined. 

     Tom Cruise’s performance as Nick is not good. I guess it’s also in part due to the writing, but he’s incredibly unlikable. You never once root for him. I realize that’s what the writers were going for, so he can be “redeemed,” but it doesn’t work at all. Cruise and Wallis’ characters are supposed to have a thing, but I legitimately didn’t understand this until there was about 20 minutes left in the film, because they have terrible chemistry. 

     There are maybe one or two jokes that are funny. Other than that, the script is just terrible. Nothing makes sense. There are entire scenes that are nothing but exposition and it still doesn’t help. You will be so confused watching this movie, as it does an awful job at letting you know how long it’s been since the previous scene, or even the previous shot.

     Actions scenes just happen, for no reason, particularly when Nick fights Dr. Jekyll, it adds nothing to the plot. Tonally, the script has absolutely no idea what it is. It’s very dark in moments, but then it tries (and fails) at being a comedy. There’s also an action scene involving spiders that if it was a little bit longer would have been ripped straight out of the video game Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception. 

     The cinematography was cool for one five second shot. I’m not sure what you expect from the directing when the director Alex Kurtzman, is the same guy who wrote the train wreck that is Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. In the spider action scene I referred to earlier, the musical que for when the spiders show up is very, very reminiscent of the one when the scorpions appear in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. 

     Aside from one cool shot, this film has nothing to offer. Zero suspense, not funny, mediocre action. 

 

[My grade for The Mummy is an F]